basically,

Raving is gross, so gross i think i might throw up thinking about it, it doesn't get fresher than Mitchell Davis, the color teal is just my color, along with burnt yellow (name? Egyptian Mustache), my right wrist works but it does it painfully, i love chiropractors, detox's are my thing, running is the one hobby i can say i'm good at, i'm trying to get good at snowboarding, the smell of tea is all i need to remember life is lovely, i wish i knew every word in the English (and French) dictionary, i'm sick of having the hair i always wanted, i'm more than ready to go natural, i need to help our environment (even if you don't think it needs it...why is that a bad thing?), i love myself, i love our world, and i have a headache. 

and there is so much more to say

i loved Thanksgiving so much. my family is truly my greatest blessing. glad to have some friends in my life. i wish my guy friends would STOP getting girlfriends, but at least they're happy. i'll just have to carry on; find the good moments; hang with good people. if you're a person who wants to enjoy life and sees the beauty in your own way, omg let's be friends! plz! 

i need to lay this down. it is never going to go anywhere with me, so please don't try. i pretend like it's going to be different every time, but i know it won't be. like somehow this boy and this kiss will feel like anything more than a shit waste of time. i haven't felt a tingle or butterfly's in my stomach since the last boy who shot me down and made my life hell for all of spring afterward. i haven't believed any guy could make a difference since the last ass hole who i thought was my best friend then turned around and snubbed me into the dirt. 

what doesn't matter to me is finding that "one guy". i couldn't care less because the only difference that guy will make is giving me another reason to post my walls. people are cool but i don't know anyone cool enough to be my all. i've had that, and i don't need it again. once was one time too many. once was enough to haunt me for all the months after, cycling through the seasons. why is it an obsession the world has? what has love got to do with anything? love is for friends and family, people do connect on that level and i believe in love. just not the kind where you care if they are talking to other girls. i don't even know what that would feel like. i guess two can share a more powerful bond than all of this nonsense; i just don't know how to comprehend it. 

Harry Potta

Harry Potta,

success? i'd say so! the movie was literally like a screen playing back to me my imagination of that sacred book. there were literally only a few tiny details missing which i can accept because none were huge deals. i noticed more lines from the book than in any other movie and every character played their part so well! at the beginning when it showed Snape i could feel his evil and wanted to punch him in the face, even though i KNOW he isn't actually a bad guy!! that's how amazing he was! and Ron! Rupert did such an incredible job of acting his emotion through the whole thing. the place where they ended it was absolutely perfect! it really could not have been any better. i loved it. 

so uh, there's my movie review

well,

i'm over what no one else seems to be. i'm into being clean like as in healthy and pure. i guess that isn't fun for others. i believe in living and being free, make choices and be happy. but if you aren't happy, change what you're doing. everything is just making me sick. i am actually happy when i'm being clean and productive. living fresh. snow boarding and running are all that i'm putting on my agenda. 

i would love to be able to catch the next plane to Switzerland, France, or England. i really need a culture shock. i need to breath new air. i realize how things are in this valley. i love the people here and i love the mountains. i just can't wait until senior trip. i'll be in London feeling like i'm alive. that's the plan anyway. i'll go alone, i don't care. i'm not sure why i am posting such a personal train of thoughts, but really i just need to get it on a screen to read to myself. as far as i can see, i'm not comfortable where i am. and i'm really searching for that comfort. 

my ideals

well, if i were to mark my body with ink, which i probably won't, i would want a few tattoos. a sun on my right shoulder blade, a cheshire cat hidden on my leg, a moulin rouge quote just somewhere, an indian chief on the side of my right arm, and a nature related image on my foot (i can't decide what). anyway, that's not a real goal it's just a what if kind of dealio. i'm going to the craft store with my step mom this weekend and we are buying a canvas and paint. then i'm creating that picture and putting it on my wall! i am also buying colorful christmas lights to go around my window. then VOILA! my room will be the complete haven. i'm saving up all of my pay checks because i need:

- a camera

-moccasin boots

-cigarette jeans/gloves/sweaters

-boarding goggles/coat

that's the plan, i'll have all of those items for december. 

the new season, the new ambitions,

 the month of November brings along with it the most magical of events. the Ready Set concert....oh drool oh drool. harry potter and the deathly hallows part one...no words, only emotions. and thanksgiving in new mexico? brilliant. the new hair cut will bring freshness, and my endurance is sky rocketing this month. i'm on top of life. i control it entirely, and i can't wait for the new experiences. time to become that snowboarding champ i dream of and to stay on my path always.

Interpretation of Gray

A perfect world
The kind Tim Burton and Henry Selick Create
Doors leading to other worlds
This feeling I’ll try to ablaqueate

I feel at home in the cold and gray
It contrasts the grass and buildings classically
The scent of mint leaves is why I think of tea
Where I am isn’t captured photographically

How can you walk away from something and then come back?
Walk around the world
In gray I would like to, find the love of my life
That plan will refuse to be soiled

Gray is Coraline, Victor Van Dort, and Edward
Magnificently creepy and beautiful life
Clay-mation and short sketches expand on reality
Switch divinity from strife