I have a love-hate relationship with the moving of time. I definitely get stir crazy if things stay the same for too long, but time has a tendency to change everything, and it can be hard in some ways.
I like to remember how things were before, and I think that's why I love photos, videos, and items that bring me back to a different time. I think part of this love came from my mom, who has at least a dozen photo albums that she made while I was growing up and always treated like a treasure. Ever since Facebook and smart phones came around, physical photo albums have converted to digital ones, but now I make my own scrap books and try to do journaling every so often.
I wouldn't necessarily want to relive anything I've been through up until this point, but I like to honor the past and where I've been. On that note I am also extremely grateful for historians and people who preserve culture and history through keeping artifacts, buildings, historical land, and important stories safe and alive. We strike a delicate balance on Earth because it's necessary in some ways to tear down and re-build in order to keep moving forward, but we need to preserve history at the same time.
Saying goodbye to 2020 doesn't feel hard. It was a good year but I am looking forward to what is in store for the future.
Here are some things I did, felt, or learned in 2020 that I want to remember. This is a PERSONAL review, so it's a very self-centered one.
Favorite books that I read: Pride and Prejudice and The Kite Runner.
Pride and Prejudice was a joyful look back into a time that I never lived but I understand why people fantasize about it. I'm sure if I had been alive back then I would have been one of the servants of the great estate and not a daughter of a rich man attending balls and dinners in expensive gowns while being pursued by handsome men, but we all get to play the princess in our own minds, right? Wealth standings aside, that era wouldn't have been an easy time for anyone. The Regency Era in England must have done something right because it's dreamy to imagine living there during that time, even with all the rules and lack of modern technologies.
The Kite Runner changed my life. It made me smile and it made me cry. I never read it in high school but I understand why educators make students read it sometimes. I think everyone should read The Kite Runner. I thought I had a soft spot for refugees before, but this book completely opened my eyes to the trauma that war-torn countries create for people. It also opened my eyes to the resilience that humans can have.
Favorite podcasts: This is a big one because podcasts essentially sustained me through this year. Here were my top podcasts in 2020-
1. Better Than Happy with Jody Moore
2. The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
3. The Life Coach School with Brooke Castillo
4. Happier with Gretchen Rubin
5. Experts on Expert with Dax Shepard
6. Correct Opinions with Trey Kennedy
7. The Rachel Hollis Podcast
8. Modern Wisdom with Chris Williamson
9. The Dave Ramsey Show
10. Ologies with Alie Ward
Favorite App: Marco Polo! Because of Marco Polo I made my friendships even stronger with people that I live states away from. This is the best app ever because you can have long and real video conversations with people on your own time.
Favorite discovery: Boba tea. Yeah I know I was late for this one. But we have boba tea shops around us here in California to the same proportion that we had cookie shops around us in Utah.
Favorite place to go in 2020: The Palace of Fine Arts in San Francisco. I found myself there several times even though it's not that close to where I live. My favorite solitary moment of this year was when I took a nap on the grass at The Palace of Fine Arts on a sunny day in the late spring.
Favorite memory: Listening to Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Askaban with Ryan while backpacking in the Sierras. This was magic.
Favorite far away place I went: Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. Era una oportunidad para jugar bajo del sol y en el agua. Comimos los mejores tacos del mundo y vimos tortugas marinas en la naturaleza. Nos quedamos el la zona romantica en un casita que tenia una piscina infinita. Fue increible y quiero regresar un dia.
Favorite date night: Ryan and I had two dates where went shopping for teens and children in need over the holidays. These were the best dates and I want to do this a few times every year going forward. Shout out to the Church for keeping us aware of needs in the community.
What I learned: I am a multidimensional human just like everyone and it's okay that I'm still evolving. It's my job to manage my own emotions and it's not my job to manage other's emotions. I also learned that I have bad night time anxiety when I eat right before bed, so not eating after 8 PM is a lifesaver for me.
What I struggled with: body acceptance and fear of aging. I also struggled to know if I was doing enough in general at my age of 27. Then stress and guilt from traveling during COVID 19 times.
Biggest Family Change of 2020: My final living great grand-parent, Granny Dee (Norma Dee Ryan), passed away on December 9th, 2020. We haven't had a funeral for her yet, but come summer 2021 we will have a large family gathering to remember her together.
My Song of 2020: "Can I Call You Tonight" by Dayglow. Ryan and I first heard this song in Austin, TX in 2018, but for some reason it just felt like my theme song in 2020. The vibe of that song matched many parts of the year for me.
What I accomplished:
*I went back to school and completed the BYU Pathway program. I started my journey toward a field I am passionate about and signed up with the CASA program.
*I was lucky to keep my job at Tri Valley Endodontics during the shut down and it was thanks to the owners that I did, but I worked hard and did my best to be the type of employee that they wouldn't want to let go of if it came to that.
*I didn't cut or color my hair all year long. That was my one and only new new years resolution for 2020.
*I got really good at making cinnamon rolls and sticky buns.
What I loved:
*Watching Kenny Vs Spenny with Ryan. I don't recommend that show to anybody. It's vile and probably a huge waste of time to watch. But during the slowness of corona virus lock down it was so much fun to watch and I don't regret it at all.
*Jogging around my neighborhood. Strava told me I ran 500 miles this year. I wasn't training for anything and I didn't have much direction for my activities but running has always been therapeutic for me and I'm glad I showed up for myself in that way.
*All the game nights we had with our friends and family this year. We went to Utah a few times in 2020, for various reasons. We got to laugh and spend time with those we love and it sustained me.
*The green spring time in the Bay area. It's almost time for things to turn green again here and I can't wait. Ryan and I went on many beautiful hikes through the mountains and hills last spring.
*My mom and Gideon's wedding in October. This was fun. They were married on a ranch in southern Utah and it was a perfect night in many ways.
*Being a part of Young Women's in my ward. This was a huge blessing for me because I've actually always wanted to serve with the Young Women. It hasn't looked exactly how I imagined it would and I often have felt like I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm grateful for the opportunity to serve. The girls and leaders have become examples for me and I've loved getting to know them.
I am so excited for 2021. I have a full-time job, a full school schedule, plus a two month training to do with CASA. After that, I will have a child to advocate for. This year will be busy and probably really hard. But I am ready for it. My hope is that I will be successful in my education and that it will lead me to be a better version of myself that can help others in professional and non-professional ways. I want to be empowered to contribute more to my community.
My intention for 2021: Be comfortable being uncomfortable
My New Years Resolution for 2021: When buying clothes, I will only purchase second hand this year. The only exception to this will be for exercise clothing and for shoes.
Okay, here we go.
